I have been in Tucson, Arizona for the last few weeks visiting family and friends. Jackson and I had so much fun, but we missed Don and we are sure glad to be back home. I haven't been back to Tucson in over 2 years! I was amazed to see how much has changed, what hasn't changed and things I had forgotten. It was like a trip down memory lane. My parents are now going to the Rincon Stake Center for Church. That was the church building I went to as a very small child. Going there to church on Sunday brought back so many fun memories.
My Mom and Dad reminded me about the trouble my best friend Jolene and I would get into. Jolene and I were inseparable. One day after church, a huge monsoon storm dumped onto Tucson. When this happened we were about 7 or 8 years old. After Jolene and I got out of primary we saw that part of the lawn that dipped down into a ditch was completely filled in with water. Her and I thought it would be so much fun to go swimming in it. Mind you we were in our very nice church dresses. With out even thinking of that we went swimming. Unbeknownst to us our parents were looking everywhere for us. When they finally found us we were in so much trouble. I remember being soaking wet and my parents were not too happy about getting their car soaked with water too. I can't remember what my parents did to punish me, but I remember Jolene's parents forbade us to see each other for awhile. Maybe my parents thought that was a good punishment too. While I was out there my Dad asked me if it was worth it. I said OF COURSE!!! I thought it was so much fun and I would do it again in a heart beat.
After I remembered that memory I started thinking of my dear friend Jolene. Her and I were the bestest of friends. Jolene had cystic fibrosis which is a deadly illness. With out a lung transplant people with that condition do not live and they don't live a very long life at that. I think I remember her beating the odds from when they expected her to live. In fact right before she died they had found her a lung donor and they were in the beginning process of doing that. Unfortunately she died before they could perform the surgery.
When we were pre-teens she moved to Washington State to be closer to a hospital that specialized in cystic fibrosis. We lost contact for years until around 2006 when I found her on Myspace. Most people change through out the years with their likes, dislikes and even personality, but she didn't. I thought it was funny to see that she was still in love with Raphael the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle (we both had a crush on him and fought over who was going to marry him someday. ;o) She even planned out her whole wedding with him. I remember the costume characters of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came to the pizza joint by my house and we went crazy like they were superstars. It was so silly, but fun.
She was truly an inspiration to me and still is. She was a fighter and an optimistic person. She died July of 2007 and I felt so blessed that I was able to reconnect with her before she died. Jolene's motto for life was "You can be mad that roses have thorns or rejoice that thorns have roses." Life is what you make it. Can you get any more optimistic than that especially with the condition she had? After she died her sister found this beautiful poem Jolene wrote. It is one of my favorite poems. Here it is:
What would you do if we just switched shoes?
How would you feel taking all those pills?
What would you do if it was hard to breathe
Always coughing on your sleeve
But what would you say, I would love to switch shoes with you
I could run and sing and shoot some ball
and not have a hard time at all.
but it would not be that much fun
it would be too weird to feel so young.
I love life and you should too
so can I take back my little shoes?
Jolene's sister wrote this after she died. I thought it was a great tribute to Jolene:
"Like so many of you, I am mourning the great loss of Jolene Renee. I know that Jolene has been gone for 7 months, and so many of us are thinking "when does this get easier?", "when will I stop hurting?" These questions and thoughts have plagued my mind, and I feel that I should give some advice that Jolene might give. So here it is:
Despite all of her trials, which there are too many to be numbered. Jolene suffered for years physically, pains we will never understand. She also endured the loss of her closest friends that shared her disease. Yet, through it all she remained strong and faithful. She always looked for the good and the beauty in the world. She lived her life in such a way that she would relish in every relationship and experience. I have never known someone who invested more in people. Even though her pain was immense, she always looked for an opportunity to help lift others. In doing these unselfish acts of service, she found peace, solace, and comfort.
This poses a poignant question, "was Jolene superhuman?" The answer is no. Jolene was like us all, in that she had trials, weaknesses, and made mistakes. What set her apart and made her so extraordinary is that she believed and had faith in her Savior, Jesus Christ. When she was hurting in any way, she would turn to her Father in Heaven for guidance and comfort. She prayed more intensely and specifically than I have ever heard anyone pray. She prayed for those she worried about by name, and she prayed for herself for strength to endure. Not to only endure, but to endure it well.
We have been given this trial of losing our sweet Jolene. We must press forward the same way that Jolene did. Live our lives to the fullest, and treating each moment and person as a gift. Loving people and serving them. Search for the good and the beautiful, despite all the pain that surrounds us at times. We can overcome our pain by turning to the Savior and plead for his mercy and strength. He knows how we feel, because he has felt it and took it upon himself. But we must turn it over to him. We must truly give the wheel of our lives to the Savior, and trust in Him that he will lead us to a place of peace and understanding.
I know that Jolene is watching over us and loving us. She is rejoicing in our triumphs and comforting us in our sorrows, just as she did through out her life. She is the same person she was on this Earth, only now she doesn't have the limitations to be hindered in any way by failing health.
I imagine her able to laugh without coughing. Run without being faint, and taking in all the beauty of Paradise in which surrounds her. I couldn't think of anyone who is more deserving, and that brings me peace. And I feel that's a start to healing……"
Love,
Karine Laura (Jolene's biggest fan and sister!)
I remember after Jolene died I felt a sense of survivors guilt. I know technically that doesn't fit, but that's the only word I could use to explain it. Part of me felt that she didn't deserve to die. What a difference she would have made in this world. I thought why do I deserve to live and not her. I am not nearly a good enough person as she was. I struggled with this for awhile. But in the end I knew she was not gone. She is still here in our hearts. She still makes a difference in people's lives even though her physical body is gone. I know in my life she still does. I can only hope to be as wonderful of a person as she was. I can't wait for the day when her and I can meet again in Heaven. Anyways, I didn't mean to write all that, but I just started and couldn't stop. :o) I had to pay tribute to Jolene.
So on to the rest of my trip. I experienced some new things while I was there. I tried sonoran hot dogs for the first time and they were fan-freaking-tastic!!! They are hot dogs with bacon wrapped around them, in a bun smothered with tomatoes, onions (mine didn't have any onions,) mayo, mustard and jalapeno hot sauce. Seriously the best food ever!!! They don't have them in San Diego so I am missing them so much right now! I will just have to make my own. Too bad they are not healthy. ;o) I also tried serrano chili chocolate ice cream... It wasn't bad. Very interesting. I can't say I didn't like it, but I wasn't crazy about it either. The little bite too it was kind of fun. Here is a picture of my Uncle making the ice cream with some of the grandkids:
We also took a little trip up to Safford, AZ to go to the open house for the Gila Valley Temple. Here is a few pictures of the new Temple.
It was gorgeous inside!!! On the way back we stopped at a few places and I got some pictures. The pictures below are of Roper Lake. It was a beautiful camp ground. I also got some pictures of Mount Graham. It had snowed on it the night before.
On the drive back we saw the prettiest sunset! I sure miss the Arizona sunsets. It was gorgeous!
The day before it rained and even hailed and snowed in some parts of Arizona. I love it when it rains there because the desert has this distinct smell. It smells like creosote bushes which smells amazing. I sure miss that smell. Here is Jackson in his car seat. The drive to Safford was a few hours and Jackson did really well. He was a good boy!
My Dad's neighbor Suzan had a baby 7 months ago and we went over there so the babies could meet. Here is Jackson and his new friend Gibson.
Of course Jackson was worn out from meeting so many people. ;o) He had to take a little rest. Hehehe... I love the hands behind the head. Relaxin Jackson. Or Chillaxin Jackson.
Here is Jackson and his Nana. My Mom decided to be called Nana instead of Grandma. Jackson has a lot of Grandmas and Grandpas and Great Grandmas! Lucky boy... ;o) He is a loved boy!
Here is Jackson and his Grandpa. I tried having my Dad be Papa, but I don't think he was down with that. Oh well...
And of course Jackson had to sit in the T-Bucket!!! He will have to wait till he is older to actually drive in it.
And I also got to see some of my friends who I dearly miss! I even got to do a maternity photo shoot of one of my best friends. Heather is in her last month of pregnancy. I am so excited for her. Her little boy is named Jackson as well, but his name is spelled Jaxon. We did not plan that, I promise. We both picked those names before we even knew the other person was going to name their son that. Great minds just think alike. ;o) Here are some of those pictures:
That's all for now. It was a fun trip, but it is great to be home.
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